The Sorrows of Love by The Sorrows of Love

Author:The Sorrows of Love
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: The School of Life

6

It was supposed to be nicer

Often, our partner isn’t necessarily being terrible in any overt way, but we feel a growing sadness about the character of our relationship: they are not as focused on us as we had hoped; there are often times when they don’t understand us properly; they are often busy and preoccupied; they can be a bit offhand or abrupt; they are not hugely interested in the details of our day; they call their friends rather than talk with us. We feel disenchanted and let down. Love was supposed to be lovely. But, without any one huge thing having gone wrong, it doesn’t much feel that way day to day.

This sorrow has a paradoxical source: we are upset now because at some point in the past we were really rather fortunate. We are sad because we have been lucky. To explain this seeming paradox we need to look at the intimate origins of love.

Our idea of what a good, loving relationship should be like (and what it feels like to be loved) never comes from what we’ve seen in adulthood; it arises from a stranger, more powerful, source. The idea of happy coupledom taps into a fundamental picture of comfort, deep security, wordless communication and of our needs being effortlessly understood that comes from early childhood.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.